This week, as Vermonters gather with family and friends for Thanksgiving dinner, they’re likely to get some questions about their independent senator who’s running for president. We’ve known and followed Bernie Sanders for years and are familiar with his populist message and irate delivery. But those who are just starting to “feel the Bern” might be outraged, if not terrified, at the idea of electing a self-described democratic socialist.
So Seven Days staffers came up with possible questions you might hear from Bernie skeptics — and how you can answer them. Let us know how your dinnertime talk turns out.
Don’t socialists want to confiscate all of our guns, melt them down and turn them into free electric cars for welfare recipients?
No, only assault weapons will be turned into electric cars — made by unionized workers.
Doesn’t Bernie want to make colleges tuition-free so kids can take classes in collectivized farming?
Yes, provided they’re organic, non-GMO farms that pay a livable wage.
If Bernie turns my post office into a bank, where will I buy stamps and see which radicalized Muslim tops this week’s FBI most-wanted list?
I’m sure Fox News will still keep you frightened. As for buying stamps, Bernie’s post office-banks will be open on Saturdays.
Won’t Bernie’s plan for single-payer health insurance require taxing us all back to the Stone Age?
No, just back to the days of President Dwight Eisenhower, a Republican, when the richest Americans paid a 91 percent tax rate.
If Bernie gets elected, he’ll be 75 when sworn in. Can his ticker weather four years of ISIS and Vladimir Putin?
Of course! He’s been shouting at this decibel for 30 years.
As Bernie is Jewish, would he outlaw saying “Merry Christmas”?
No, but Starbucks may put a hammer and sickle on its red coffee cups.
What’s with Bernie’s wild hair?
If you’d been pulling your hair out about the decline of the middle class for as long as Bernie has, you’d look frazzled, too.
Bernie’s always railing about how the richest one-tenth of 1 percent own more than the bottom 90 percent but pay less than two-fifths of … whatever. Why’s he such an egghead?
It’s called basic math. He learned it at a “socialized” public school.
Bernie says climate change is a bigger national security threat than ISIS. Is he actually a fundamentalist extremist whose sleeper cell has infiltrated the U.S. Senate?
No, you’re confusing him with Ted Cruz.
If a Scandinavian-style democratic socialist took the White House, wouldn’t we lose all daylight in winter?
Yes, and we’d be force-fed pickled herring and a higher quality of life.
If Bernie’s not owned by a super PAC, who’s going to give him his marching orders once he’s elected?
Rachel Maddow.
Ben Carson is a neurosurgeon. Carly Fiorina ran a Fortune 500 company. Donald Trump has made billions of dollars. What qualifies Bernie to lead the free world?
Well, he was a Jewish carpenter.
The original print version of this article was headlined “Talking Turkey About Bernie”
This article appears in Nov 25 – Dec 1, 2015.
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“It’s called basic math”. Well, he still needs to do the math. We can tax the top 1% at 100% and still not make a dent in the National Debt, which currently stands at >$18 trillion! Add Bernie’s programs like free college for all who want it, and the equation is even more lopsided. The point is, he needs to address the National Debt as critically, if not more critically, than income inequality. I don’t ever hear him discuss the National Debt, one of our most pressing issues.
@Ozman Bernies programs will save money America money when compared to a republican/Hillary’s ideas over a 10 year period.
@Dalton, Using Bernie’s own figures, his plans would save $3.6T over 10 years. It’s on his website – look it up. Well the debt is already at $18T, so if all other programs stand still (no additional spending, which won’t happen) we’re still almost $15T in debt 10 years from now. Again, the numbers are from Bernie’s website (except the current National Debt, that’s well known and comes from the Federal Reserve).
How about this from one of those crazy uncles:
I have some concerns about how effective Bernie will be as a chief executive.
His big selling point is his absolute, uncompromising nature on any issue ever.
No matter who controls Congress they will most assuredly be against him.
How exactly is he going to get any of his promised legislation through Congress?
I like Sevenday.. but you all (staff) are so gaga over Bernie.. you never mention the bad points about him.. to bad too..but guess when your paper is a liberal paper like the Free Press what do I expect…a honest fair paper.. guess not.. Bernie is a NUTCASE..
@Donna … I’m guessing you have never, ever listened to a full speech of Bernie Sanders. I’m guessing you get your information from Faux News…or any of the Media stations, which is all controlled by the 1%. FYI..Bernie Sanders is not a “NUTCASE!” You obviously do not recognize intelligence when it’s staring you in the face!
@Ozman… So ‘who’ of all the candidates do you think has the capacity to reduce the National Debt??? FYI, Bernie has no intention of increasing the National debt to fund public colleges. If you actually listened to him, you would know this.
Bernie’s free college is paid by the speculation on Wall Street…after all, we. the taxpayers bailed them out, it’s time they put out to help with education. Check out his solutions on is site…Bernie.com. Check it out, then make your decisions.
How are we ever going to pay off the national debt when we are able to create as much money as we want at any time we want to create it. The FED has already created trillions of dollars to bail out the banks.
Speaking of banks, do they worry about how they are going to pay their depositors all the money they owe them? It’s more like the laugh all the way to their banks when depositors put money in their hands. They know that if the depositors want more of their money back than the banks have on hand, the FED will just make more money for them to hand out. Somehow, you think the FED can’t do the same for the government of which they are a part.
The FEDS are NOT a part of the US Govt. That is a common misconception. (Sigh). It’s a private organization of bankers, and the president is allowed to appoint its chair. Not sure it has much else going for it. Not for us.
Isn’t the balance of trade a worse problem than the national debt?
Bernie is a nut job and wouldn’t get elected dog-catcher any place else except for wacky-left VT. He has no chance of getting the Dem nod and only soldiers on because of how loony he is. I’m embarrassed to be a resident of this state when it comes to Bernie and I avoid any discussion of him whenever his name comes up in conversation.
Look around you.
We need a political and economic revolution to save our country.
Bernie enables us to do it peacefully.
He speaks the truth.
Save our country’s democratic values and freedoms by taking back our vote from the millionaires and billionaires!
@Harry, both balance of trade and the National debt are problems. A balance of trade deficit (which we have – that’s a problem) makes the National debt worse. IMHO, the National Debt is worse simply because it is so severe. I think if more people would try to understand the magnitude of the problem they would demand that politicians do something about it. But right now, they’re not even talking about it, except for campaign lip service.