In social media posts on Friday, Burlington’s parks, recreation and waterfront department noted that the repaved path is slightly wider than before, making it harder to stymie the flow of cyclists who are attempting to use the path for its intended purpose.
“We just want to make sure the walking community understands that they’ll have to double down on their efforts to make the bike path more dangerous for cyclists than riding in the streets,” department spokesperson Meredith Ovslovski told the Parmelee Post.
“For all its imperfections, the previous bike path needed only a family of four walking side-by-side to completely bottleneck it,” Ovslovski said. “Our engineers have determined that it will now take as many six or seven pedestrians to effectively obstruct the path. So we’re encouraging walking families to band together in order to make cyclists struggle to pass them.”
Ovslovski went on to explain that smaller walking groups could still block the path, but would have to be more creative and determined.
“Sometimes all it takes is a few pool noodles, or even the dribbling of a basketball, to force a cyclist off the path and into a tree,” she said. “People should not be afraid to experiment and find what works best for them.”
Despite these new challenges, pedestrians are encouraged to keep up their tried-and-true methods. For example, the department strongly recommends they continue to completely ignore the sound of bike bells or desperate cries of “On your left!” as they mosey along.
“I can’t stress enough how important this warning from the city is,” said habitual walker and stay-at-home son Clint Duckerman. “I don’t think people realize how much effort goes into being completely oblivious to your surroundings.
“I know for a fact that some walkers see those lines painted down the middle of the path and assume they represent separate lanes for traffic traveling in different directions,” Duckerman continued. “It’s like they have no idea that you have to erratically zigzag across the entire width of the path if you want to risk harm to yourself and the cyclists trying to pass you. It takes a lot of effort to stay in the way!”
The Parmelee Post is a weekly series featuring tough investigative reporting on news that hasn’t happened.
This article appears in Apr 12-18, 2017.
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The intended purpose of the Island Line Trail is as follows:
Island Line Rail Trail Facts
States: Vermont
Counties: Chittenden, Grand Isle
Length: 14 miles
Trail end points: Austin Drive in Oakledge Park (Burlington) and Martin Road (South Hero)
Trail surfaces: Asphalt, Gravel
Trail category: Rail-Trail
ID: 6032327
Trail activites: Bike, Inline Skating, Fishing, Wheelchair Accessible, Walking, Cross Country Skiing
Hard to tell if the author’s satire is directed at inconsiderate pedestrians on the path, or whether he’s actually trying to satirically sound like one of the aggressive, dangerous cyclists who think a bell and a yell of “on your left” gives them full license to bike as fast as possible through a crowd of people.
Regardless, the new section of path from the Skatepark to North Beach is gorgeous and a huge improvement and asset for the City of Bulrlington. With all the free parking now available at the Skatepark, this is going to be a really busy stretch of path, and I suspect that cyclists will be in the vast minority through here, so hopefully they will slow down and enjoy the pretty views, and not give all cyclists a bad name.
No mention of the path’s true menace, rollerbladers! Who invented a sport that requires flailing arms, zig-zagging and spandex shorts? “In-Line” skating my foot! More like akimbo-rolling!
Okay people, humorless responses in 3…2….1….
Carol sounds like one of those people that like to cross a busy street at an angle, to increase the time people have to watch her. I bet she likes to walk her dog on the bike path with a 20 foot leash.
Carol if you want to concentrate on the view, do so on the side of the path, not on it.