Dear Reverend,
I have a friend who uses the word “literally” all the time — literally. Every conversation, be it a text message, on the phone or in person, she says it multiple times. It really grates on my nerves, and I don’t know how to make her stop. Help!
Ward Smith (man, 32)
Dear Ward Smith,
I feel your pain. The misuse and overuse of words are two big pet peeves of mine. Maybe it has something to do with my coming of age in the era of Valley girl- and preppy-speak, when “awesome” and “totally” were bandied about willy-nilly.
My skin crawls when someone pronounces “voluptuous” with an M. And when someone punctuates every other word with “like,” I can’t help but keep a running tally and find it hard to focus on anything else. But I digress.
Merriam-Webster has two definitions for the word “literally,” one being “in a literal sense or manner” and the other “in effect: virtually — used in an exaggerated way to emphasize a statement or description that is not literally true or possible.”
English is a weird language.
As a matter of fact, an FAQ on merriam-webster.com has this to say: “The ‘in effect; virtually’ meaning of literally is not new. It has been in regular use since the 18th century and may be found in the writings of some of the most highly regarded writers of the 19th and early 20th centuries, including Charles Dickens, Mark Twain, Charlotte Brontë, and James Joyce.”
So, even though you find your friend’s overuse of the word to be annoying, it’s not exactly incorrect.
You need to decide if bringing up the issue is worth possibly hurting your pal’s feelings. If she’s a really close friend who can take some good-natured ribbing, you could broach the subject with humor. Something like: “You literally say ‘literally’ all the time, and it’s literally making me lose my mind.” Just pointing it out casually could make her aware of this verbal crutch.
However, if she has a thin skin and might be offended, you literally ought to try harder to Zen it out and let it go.
Good luck and God bless,
The Reverend
This article appears in Feb 21-27, 2024.
