The board members, Bailey Cummings and Timber Adamson, told Seven Days Tuesday that they wanted the Pride Center to issue a statement criticizing the name of the bar, which they view as an insult to trans women.
Instead, the board’s executive committee decided to hold a town meeting-style forum on trans issues Thursday and get more feedback from the community. The resigning board members saw that as a cop-out.
“Basically the name of this bar is a transmisogynistic slur,” Cummings said. “And I feel strongly as community leaders that the Pride Center is responsible for standing up for our trans community members, and coming out against a slur.”
Adamson cited similar reasons for quitting the board of the gay rights group.
“I can’t continue to support an organization that doesn’t feel the need to stand up and make a statement in regards to a transphobic slur in our community,” Adamson said.
The resignations came after the executive committee of the board met Monday night. Members considered three possible statements but ultimately decided to get more input before taking a public position, said Paul Sisson, co-chair of the board.
He expressed dismay about the two resignations, which drop the board from nine to seven people. He noted the board is composed of volunteers.
“We’re doing the best we can to manage a crisis situation we kind of got thrust into on Sunday,” Sisson said. “I think the whole thing is unfortunate.”
The Pride Center has long been supportive of the trans community, Sisson said, adding: “I’m disappointed that we lost two valued board members as a result of this situation.”
The Pride Center issued a statement on the Mister Sister issue later Tuesday.
He plans to close his wine bar Oak45 after Tuesday and reopen the new bar in the same space on Main Street March 10.
He issued a statement late Monday night indicating he will stick with the name. Tuesday morning, in a brief online exchange with Seven Days, he declined to comment further.
The name is anything but a slur, McGaughan said in the statement.
“Like all names, Mister Sister will have different associations, interpretations and will be perceived differently by individuals. My interpretation of Mister Sister is one of inclusiveness. It is a term that has been used among gays and Drag Queens for decades intended to be positively gender-bending. Mister Sister is for the misters and the sisters, those that identify as both and everyone in between.”
The statement continued: “The official description of Mister Sister is ‘a gay bar for him, her and them.’ I have been very intentional in using a pronoun that isn’t specifically male or female as a way to include anyone that identifies as part of the LGBTQ community.”
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Kudos to the members who stepped down. Pride Center would do well to fill those spots with people who are able to draw on their own experience with transmisogyny. This way faltering on such an easy subject won’t happen again in the future.
“Pride Center has long been supportive of the trans community, Sisson said, adding: “I’m disappointed that we lost two valued board members as a result of this situation. “
While it’s great that the Pride Center is congratulating itself of what it feels like is years of support for the trans community, it’s too bad that their actions don’t usually show hat support.
Lack of trans support by the Pride Center is seen every time it’s current director assumes those in the LGBT community are cis and gay unless she can visually identify them as trans. This in of itself is transphobic.
Lack of trans support by the Pride Center is on display when they hold an event billed as Know Your Rights: Trans Law under the New Admin (paraphrasing) and the only panelists are LGB experts who are openly uncomfortable talking about trans law and are open about their lack of knowledge in the field.
We need a new Pride Center, one that doesn’t just pay lip crevice to trans identities but actually includes and supports trans identities. When can we have that Pride Center please?
I pray this guy doesn’t change the name of his bar and I am completely disgusted at this stupidity created out of nothing. When you need to walk a mile out of your way because trans people are not allowed to use the same bathroom as others, when you watch a friend being beaten for being different, when you visit someone who has been jailed unjustly for being who they are, then you can come whining to the community about the name of a bar.
Do you have any understanding of slavery? Of Jim Crow laws? Of lynching a black child for being rude to a white person? How does any black person survive in this country without being continually enraged? For trans people to be outraged over this ridiculous non-issue shows how spoiled and privileged and lucky you are to live in such a inclusive and kind community.
You all should be ashamed of yourselves, please take the time you’re spending to harass this business owner and help a LGBT youth or help anyone who has had it a great deal worse than you. If black people can deal with overt racism and being shot by police and being denied voting rights, you can deal with a guy naming his bar something you don’t like.
Someone explain to me how this is a slur- please. I am trying to understand- cause right now it seems much ado about nothing, should have just called it Tallywackers and be done with it.
Do any of the 9 (now 7) board members of the Pride Center actually own this bar? No? Oh, then you don’t have any say in how it gets named. Don’t go there if you don’t like the name.
A name of a bar should not be overly scrutinized. This type of criticism only causes divisiveness within a community. This community has a far greater fight right now other than a bar owned by a member of the LGBTQ community.
This whole situation is sad. It’s unfortunate during a time when this new administration is systematically erasing the rights of trans individuals that the owner refused to understand the concerns over transphobia in the name. It’s also sad that opponents of the name were equally as stubborn in their ability to overlook the name of the bar or understand the owner’s point of view concerning the historical connotation in the name. And what’s saddest of all, the lack of enthusiasm and support from a large sector of the LGBT community and what I am sure is a huge headache for the owner over this issue will probably result in an early closing of what would be the only dammed gay bar in this area!!!!
Space Program – Tribe Called Quest….LOOK IT UP
PEACE!
How disappointing. This is likely misplaced anger that should be focused on DC, not Winooski! If people quit a nonorofit board based on something that has ZERO to do with the nonprofit organization, I’m thinking that the nonprofit may be better able to focus on their actual work moving forward. I’m surprised they didn’t quit following the Trump victory because the nonprofit didn’t speak out loudly enough against him. Trump’s victory has a *bit* more importance than the name of a bar in Winooski. Perhaps the bar name should be “Butthurtz.” Double entendre, anyone?
When are you opening? I can’t wait to see this place!!
There are few people who have suffered more at the hands of transphobia in Vermont in the current day and age than me and my family. If anyone feels that the moniker ‘MisterSister’ is offensive or worse yet, “Verbal Violence” (which can NOT truly even exist-these are just words,they only have the meaning YOU give them!) than you folks are the ones who need to “check your privilege”. If you have the luxury of being offended at what someone chooses to name their own private business and stage meetings,protests and start FaceBook pages dedicated to the discussion, you are far more privileged than I ,as I don’t have that luxury- instead I have to figure out how to feed my family as I lost my job to due transphobia. Enjoy your Latte’s at your community meeting to destroy this poor man’s business and future livelihood.
I confess, I know very little about trans history and have usually buttoned my lip and felt ignorant rather than make my trans friends suffer my impertinent questions. I thought the name was charming and had no idea it had a history as a slur. But honestly, if it was me, I’d mourn my clever name and sigh a little over my good intentions, then pay the $50 to register a new name. Because really, how many tears will it cost me? And how much will it matter to embattled trans folk who just want to feel like they matter? That decision just sounds pretty easy to me.
What Jana said!
This is just hysterical. These entitled, overly sensitive, self righteous nincompoops resign in sanctimonious fury – good riddance. Here’s the deal – its not your business so you don’t have a say in what it’s named. If the trans community doesn’t like the name, well, tough. They don’t have to go there. Many of us in the gay community are getting a little sick of the whole and constant victim mentality in the trans community. We’ve tried to be inclusive but the trans community is perpetually offended by something. I’m looking forward to hanging out at Vermont’s newest gay bar! If the trans community doesn’t like it, they can put their money where their mouth is and open a trans bar and call it whatever they’d like!
Fascinating how the feelings and responses of trans Vermonters seem uniquely subject to everyone else’s approval. Enthusiastic approval, even, given how much relish both the owner and so many commenters seem to take in “putting them in their place” (that place being irrelevance, apparently).
I like the name, actually.
Odum – You seem to think that the feelings and responses of Vermonters who have commented here and don’t agree with your take on things are apparently subject to YOUR approval and YOU seem to relish putting them in their place. Here’s the deal, we didn’t start this discussion/argument. Some people decided that how THEY feel should give them some kind of right to be the arbiters of what a business owner can and cannot name his business and they decided to make a circus out of it and bring it to the attention of the media in the hopes of forcing/shaming him into doing what they want him to do. Somehow, it would seem, you and people like you seem to feel that YOUR feelings and opinions should dictate other peoples business decisions. In reality, if you and your friends don’t like/approve of something the business owner is doing then your recourse is to not patronize that business. Its really pretty simple. But since you have all chosen to take this fight public then you all need to expect that people will publicly disagree with you and call out the bullying/shaming behavior of those that started the argument. Transmisogynistic slur? What nonsense! Its time for people to put to their big boy/girl pants and stop playing the victim. Nobody is slurring anyone. Its a fun name for what will hopefully be a fun place.
Whats wrong with the name “MISTER SISTER” ???? Yrs and Yrs ago Burlington had a bar called PEARLS..
Are these complainers jealous that they didn’t come up with this idea, because that’s what it sounds like..It’s something when certain people think they can tell a business owner what to name their business and what to do..Last time I looked this is America not some communist country..Instead of trying to stick your nose into some one else business, why not start your own and pick your own name..
If people really want to understand why this is offensive to transwoman and the transgender community, take some time ,and attended the meeting ,at the senior community center ,at 630, education goes a long ways.
Offense-taking is boring. Either there’s been an injury or there hasn’t. And if there has, we have courts to remedy that. But I suspect there hasn’t.
I am pleased to see the PRIDE Center remembered that it was also meant to serve the LGB community. If they had opposed the bar based on a few people who are taking offense to the name it would hardly be representative of community opinion.
What I have been told by trans people is that saying the name Mister Sister is intended to be taken as “inclusive” is like opening a bar in the south and calling it “Cracker Ni**er” so that both rednecks and blacks will feel welcome there.
Hope to see all at the meeting,
Penelope: “Do you have any understanding of slavery? Of Jim Crow laws? Of lynching a black child for being rude to a white person? … If black people can deal with overt racism and being shot by police and being denied voting rights, you can deal with a guy naming his bar something you don’t like.”
It’s funny you bring up murder here because trans women – and especially trans women of color – are disproportionately the victims of violent hate-motivated crimes and homicides. They are more so than any other minority group in the USA, when you consider how tiny a percentage of the population they are. The majority of hate homicides against LGBTQ people in 2013 were actually perpetrated against trans women (e.g. http://www.avp.org/storage/documents/ncavp_transhvfactsheet.pdf). Trans women also experience disproportionately high rates of sexual abuse and assault; some studies actually estimate that again, the *majority* of trans women have been sexually abused or assaulted. That’s horrifying to me.
Personally I feel pretty disappointed, as a gay guy from Burlington, that there are so many comments from gay men who are so attached to this name that they want to pick a fight over it with some of the most vulnerable members of our community (who supported us back in the early days and then got promptly thrown under the bus by our most visible activist group, the HRC).
This is ageism! The bar name, and variations of it, have been in use for decades (if not centuries) as code for queer. To now say it is unacceptable smacks of cultural cleansing and ignoring history to suit the tender sensibilities of the current set of politically correct snowflakes. Pick your battles folks. There are plenty of other real enemies to be addressed. I am seriously offended at this tempest in a teapot.